Suffering is my Protector
Suffering is my Protector
How many years have gone by, pursuing this and that empty of tangibility,
Yet all I have is a sense of voidness dancing in the peripherals of my thoughts,
In the past I always had a warm lover by my side,
now my companion is exchanged for sickness,
I was handsome and well spoken, all the admirers swooned,
now I’m giddy when I see my reflection in the mirror,
I was strong and prided myself on my body,
now my body is the very object to cause pain,
I ate so much, laughed, drank, partied, gambled, traveled,
now I in fear of the biggest journey nearing day by day,
Memories of the past flood my mind and dreams,
when I awaken, I’m back to stark reality,
Nothing enchants, excites and or thrills me much,
but wishing I can turn time back to start a different life of wisdom,
Regrets, fears, and lost chances haunt me although
I look for words, advices and readings for comfort, though temporary,
If I had only realized everything I believed in as permanent happiness,
was far from permanent early on, then I would have more to show for now,
Now how fortunate I have come across the nectar of Truth,
spoken by the perfect Buddha,who has left the realm I’m trapped in,
Having heard Buddha’s thoughts, I resolve to turn my life around now,
Not to miss this chance which will never arise again,
I will commit my energies, time and efforts to my spirituality,
even more vehemently than my pursuit of pleasures in the past,
I have so many to thank and so much to apologize for,
empty words and gestures will be replaced by spiritual success for them,
I will hold the Buddha deep in my heart, not transgressing even the smallest
of teachings as a sign of my true awakening and to awaken the Buddha in me,
No more excuse, procrastinations, justifications and eloquence
protecting my downfalls, attachments, laziness and lack of success,
I am a changed person, blessed to hear the nectar of the speech of my guru,
he taught the truth without agenda, no sweet talk for once,
I cannot expect miracles, or a drastic turn around for the power of karma is
the most potent energy even my guru or the perfect Buddha cannot override,
Whatever I have committed with glee, now I must face with fear, not to blame dharma,
Buddha, protector or a savior, but to experience it knowing I have damaged others,
Now I must be mature and face my results without blaming, begrudging or sinking
into lower states of thoughts, as who can prevent karma, not even the Buddha,
Be strong, be firm, be adult, and know whatever we experience will end, will cease,
and there is a new beginning if we create the causes now as we suffer,
As we suffer we realize we have created the karma for it, so now resolve to
never commit again those deeds as you have been blessed to understand,
Understanding the cause of our problems is our protector, as it protects us
to never commit those actions in the future,
Create the positive causes now, do not think as you suffer everything else is at a standstill,
karma is still accumulating even when we are happy or unhappy, that’s your hope,
Now that we have found the dharma, put this above all the rest, as dharma
cannot die, everything else has died or will die, why invest in death,
Take refuge from your inner depths and express it through the actions of your kind heart,
skillful speech, attitude of care and concern for others free of agenda unlike the ignorant,
There is only up or down, the in between is not static and all our pleasant cum unpleasant
experiences resemble a roller-coaster ride that will end, realize by action now,
Let the end not be the beginning of another round in the amusement park of samsara,
but our end should be the sunrise of spiritual awakening, change and action,
The kind Lama named Buddha has elucidated the complete path and proven its value
with his own enlightenment, so what delays or excuses should we make now,
Have loyalty and gratitude towards your teacher, lay all your energies to practice the Diamond Lady*, Known for her expediency, and realize your sufferings are your real protector opening your eyes to past deeds,
Be happy, practice, persevere and never lose hope in the path of the virtuous but run far and fast from another life in useless redundancy which is prison-like and endless without purpose.
Tsem Rinpoche
Spontaneous poem composed March 28, 2011 Kuala Lumpur
*Vajra Yogini
(Chinese translation by Dr Lanse)
痛苦是我的守护神
多少个年头过去了，我追求的都是一些空无的存在，
此刻与我同在的，仅是在思维边境肆无忌惮起舞的虚幻感，
过去身旁总有情人温柔的依偎，
如今伴随我的却只有病痛，
我曾是多么俊逸不凡、能言善道，仰慕者都为我目眩神迷，
现在我却为自己镜中的倒影感到晕眩，
过去我为我强壮的身躯感到自豪，
如今这副躯壳却是苦痛的源头，
我曾尽情吃喝玩乐、畅赌游荡，
但终极旅途的日渐逼近竟使我胆怯，
过去的记忆淹没了我的脑海和梦境，
苏醒时我却只能回到荒凉的现实，
再没什么能让我陶醉、兴奋或颤抖
只愿时光能倒流，让我用智慧活出跟以往不同的人生，
尽管我渴求借助文字、忠告及占卜以获得短暂的慰藉，
悔意、恐惧以及痛失良机的惶恐仍似鬼魅般如影随形，
若更早前我经已发现所认为能永存的快乐其实离永久好远，
那我今日的成就必然更为不凡，
所幸此刻我得以碰见真理的琼浆，
那过去从佛陀口中吐出的珍言，仍存在于我身困的人道，
听取了佛陀的教诲，我决定从此改变自己的人生，
只求不错过这绝无仅有的机会，
我将把精力、时间和心思全然投入修行中，
那热情甚至比过往追求欢愉时来得更强烈，
我有好多谢意和歉意欲向他人表达，
但这些空乏的话语和动作即将被修行的成果所取代，
我将佛陀紧守在心灵深处，纵使是祂最细微的教诲我亦不会逾矩，
除了证明自己确切的觉醒，也要唤醒内在的佛性，
不再以任何藉口、拖延、辩解和雄辩
来维护自己的堕落、执著、怠惰和一事无成，
有幸听闻了上师宝贵的教诲，我已不再是过去的我，
他道出实相，不含任何企图，亦不说甜蜜的话语，
我不能期盼奇迹的出现或突发的转折，因为因果是最恒定的力量，
即便是上师或佛陀也无法超越，
那些过去在欢愉时的所为，今天我只能以惊恐的心情来面对；
体悟自己曾对他人造成伤害，我已无法埋怨佛法、佛陀、护法或救世主，唯有去经历。
现在我必须成熟地面对眼前的果报，不带怨言、不快或诉诸低劣的想法；
只因任谁也无法从因果业力中逃脱，纵使是佛陀也在所难免。
要像成人般坚强和坚定，并了解任何经历都会结束和停止，
若我们因身处痛苦而造因，那便是另一个因果循环的开始。
面对痛苦之时，需知一切皆源于我们所造的因，
既然有幸明白，就决定不再重犯同样的过错，
了解一切问题的导因，其本身就是我们的护法神，
因它能使我们在往后的日子不重蹈覆辙。
现在就种下善因，别以为痛苦之际一切亦会随之停顿，
快乐与否，因果仍然在累积；那是你的希望，
既然已觅得佛法，就将其置在万物之上，
因佛法是恒久的，其余种种若非已死便是行之将死，又何须在死亡上下注，
从心深处寻求皈依，将慈悲、善巧和不带企图的关怀以行动表达出来，
别像那些无知的人，
这里只有上升或下降，中间并没有一丝的静止，而我们的一切欢乐与悲哀
就仿似乘坐一趟过山车，终有到站的时候，且让我们透过行动来体悟
别让这个终点成为娑婆游乐园中另一个回环的起点，
我们的终点本该是觉醒、改变及行动的旭日，
那名为佛陀的慈悲喇嘛已勾勒出完整的路径，
祂以自身的觉悟证实了个中的价值，我们该找寻什么借口又凭什么拖延
对上师忠诚，心存感激，竭尽全力修持钻石佛母*这快捷法门，
体悟痛苦就是你真正的护法神，祂让你睁开双眼正视过去的行径，
保持开朗，专注修持，坚持不懈且永不对道德之途感到绝望，
迅速远离那牢狱般，永无止境的重复、毫无目的另一世。
詹仁波切
即兴创作 笔于2011年3月28日，吉隆坡
*金刚瑜伽母
So beautiful. I hope tomorrow to make a good wise choice after meditating on this tonite
“do not think that everything else is at a standstill,”
I needed to hear that Rinpoche, thank you
So beautifully elucidated! A complete path by itself. I prostrate to the Guru. Thank you!
Rinpoche, Thank you very very much for this lovely poem, it brought sense to me, this is the best advice i had hope to hear or see in this difficult time.
“Be strong, be firm, be adult, and know whatever we experience will end, will cease,
and there is a new beginning if we create the causes now as we suffer”
this phrase gives me hope and confident to overcome the situation.
really appreciate this poem.
Thank You very much Your Presence
These are truly beautiful and precious words…as always, my dearest Guru, your words of wisdom never fails to move us, wake us up and inspire us.
We are really very lucky and blessed to have Rinpoche with us. I cannot say this enough, and I cannot thank Rinpoche enough.
I think of all the wonderful gifts that Rinpoche has given me is really the idea that I can truly turn my life around – not just for this life, but for all lifetimes. It began with an idea, and then the path unfolded, forged by the teachings and kindness that Rinpoche has given me over the years. These are things which we cannot measure and quantify.
The greatest of all gifts is, of course, the Diamond Lady herself.
May I never part from my Guru and the brilliant Vajrayogini.
This is a True Dharma Teaching.
Thank you!
Thank you Rinpoche for such a profound teaching. The time is now to practice!
Between the new dharmic path and the old wicked samsaric ways, is a bridge which we must cross. And there we encounter all our evil and demonic ways, we feel the pain we inflicted on fellow beings and other sentient beings and we face the suffering we caused others. We face our ugly self. And its too ugly to bear.
Is there no magic wand to wave it all away? Is there a magic mantra to make it all go away? Alas, no, for to walk the dharmic path requires us to face up and overcome the Self. Courage comes only from practicing true dharma and being prepared to suffer for the suffering we caused. I pray I have that.
Thank you Rinpoche for this beautiful poem. I wish I could find words of equal eloquence to express the depth of my gratitude for your teachings. Every article I read, every video I watch moves me. I leave this site and your youtube channel feeling truly changed with every lesson. The 8 Verses of Mind Transformation and Lama Tsongkhapa Guru Yoga that you recommended have become a part of my daily practice and just as you said, it has already brought me great happiness. Any questions I have about right thought, right speech, or right action are answered right there and takes such a weight off my shoulders. Life is so much more enjoyable with Dharma practice even though it’s not always easy. It makes me laugh at my foolishness of chasing shadows of happiness all these years! I really am my own worst enemy. There is no gift that will ever be more precious to me than the lessons you give. Again, thank you. I hope all sentient beings get the opportunity to learn from you. I hope you live a long life happily knowing what a difference you make in the lives of others.
Thank you so very much, a poem harder striking than a hammer yet beautiful and soothing like a blossom of early leafs in spring. I will treasure these words so clearly written and endure the results of a life of self-indulgence, smiling in the proven belief that having choosen badly, one can also choose good. Thank you once again.
I am going to laminate and frame these 30 verses and hang it on my shrine room to meditate daily.
Every word and verse is golden advice and touches my heart and soul.
We must have done something good amidst all our delusions and foolishness to be given such a teaching at this juncture in our life where it matters most.
My precious and kind Guru, your eloquent speech is the ear ornament of the fortunate.
May you live long to benefit all.
Totally! I believe it can heal anyone with depression, lift the hopes of many, answers so many questions, make people better people, oh i can go on and on.
I’m going to put this on my desktop so i can read it daily and spread it around on the net.
Thank you Rinpoche for this precious guidance!
All bad conditions can appear as a support.
Shelly Tai on mar 30,2011 at 10:26am
Such a inspiring poem, thank you Rinpoche it really give us a thought to think about our daily life.
Thank you very, very much, Rinpoche, for this beautifully spontaneous poem. I read and think I understand but I know I am far from realizing what Rinpoche had. I will put in all my effort to practice because death is very near, it is not to say I am in ill health and am dying but who knows when?
Dear Rinpoche,thank you for this wonderfully inspiring poem.I love this poem, as I love all of Rinpoche’s teachings in all their forms.
This lovely poem begins by creating our awareness of,and sense of regret for, having wasted all the years of this life so far in the meaningless pursuit of effervescent happiness.. This will not help us at all at death and when we move to yet another rebirth in the cyclic existence of samsara.
I like when the poem ‘turns’ and ‘spirals upward’ on a note of great hope -
‘Now how fortunate I have come across the nectar of Truth,
Spoken by the perfect Buddha, who has left the realm I’m trapped in’.
Hope expands to determination not to let this one and only chance of getting out of the abysmal suffering of samsara go -
‘Having learned the Buddha’s thoughts, I resolve to turn my life around now,
Not to miss this chance which will never arise again’.
Like a symphony it reaches its crescendo of hope and positive action( that rest on the foundation of ‘taking personal responsibility’), by urging us to let Dharma and Guru Devotion and the practice of the Diamond Lady reign supreme in our lives from now on.
Thank you, Rinpoche for your Teachings in this beautiful poem.
I will put this teachings into practice as “How many years have gone by, pursuing this and that empty of tangibility, yet all I have is a sense of voidness dancing in the peripherals of my thoughts,” and “I will commit my energies, time and efforts to my spirituality, even more vehemently than my pursuit of pleasures in the past.”
Death is just nearby so “Now that we have found the dharma, put this above all the rest, as dharma cannot die, everything else has died or will die, why invest in death.”
Every word in this poem is a Teaching and “Having heard Buddha’s thoughts, I resolve to turn my life around now, Not to miss this chance which will never arise again”.
Thank you again, Rinpoche, for your Teachings which always come in many ways and this time in the form of poem.
Thank You very much for this lovely poem, Rinpoche. Every word and phrase is so true. For those who always had comfortable lives, most of them ‘hardly’ gain much in life one way or another.
Most of those who had gone through suffering are those that could rise to any occasion and become a victor. They are the ones who are more likely to strive to achieve something better out of whatever situation they are in and become stronger.
Just like marble, in order to become a beautiful piece of art/sculpture, it has to endure the painful process of being cut and carved, the end result is beautiful. As compared to a piece of floor marble who are being stepped on day in day out.
“What is the difference between an obstacle and an opportunity? Our attitude toward it. Every opportunity has a difficulty, and every difficulty has an opportunity.”
So is suffering really suffering or is it a portal for us to grow stronger…… A choice for us to choose…
Dear Rinpoche
Thank you so much for this beautiful poem which I wouild very much like to share with friends and staff…it’s so so true. No matter how difficult or sad a situation is, one has to be responsible for whatever actions one take and understanding the causes of the problems. To take a stance never to commit negative actions again is our protector to our own suffering. All these are within our own hands. Where do we want to go? Suffering or Happiness?
Thank you once again.
Once sufferings had opened our eyes to our past deeds, may love and kindness replace them and guide us to apply the lessons learned, may my guru devotion travel thousands of miles and reach you; words would never be enough to express my gratitude, respect and affection.
Rinpoche, this spontaneous poem could not have been more applicable for me as I turn 40 years old this year. I do not know why but this year feels like a year of reflection and contemplation. Looking at the past 40 years of my life, there seems to be lot yet so very empty. I do not say this for Dharma promotion but the truth as I see it, if my 40 years was filled with the people who are around me now and the Dharma and Rinpoche, I would be walking bliss. And I would be so proud of so much. I rejoice that this awakening happens now at 40 and not 80 when I cannot do anything rapidly to be of purpose to others and of course myself.
Till I die, my motto: hopefully Rinpoche has not got copyrights on this verse
“Be happy, practice, persevere and never lose hope in the path of the virtuous but run far and fast from another life in useless redundancy which is prison-like and endless without purpose.”
Much love and respect,
Li Kim