Avalokiteshvara, Turkey Swamp, Marc & Me
November 9, 2010
Turkey Swamp was a large park with huge lake around 3 hours bicycle ride from my childhood home in New Jersey. If you went by car it’s around 45 mins or more. One of my relatives took me there once and I loved it as a kid. I asked my childhood friend Marc Reed to bicycle there with me. He was very agreeable. He is a very outdoor type of person, strong, energetic and game to try any physical activity. So off Marc and I went…..it was a real LONG bike ride and physically gruelling 2-3 hours…by when your a kid, it’s ok…I could never tell my parents I went there. They would be horrified I went so far by bicycle….and even more horrified I went there to pray….LOL.
Once we got there we’d walk around together and I would ask Marc to do his thing and I would want to meditate alone.. Marc is very accommodating and a very nice guy and good joker too. He would always oblige (Thank you very much Marc…thank you for your friendship). He would keep himself busy at another spot of the Park where there were more people and I would be left in a secluded area. He would come back to get me after a few hours when I was done. When I asked him what he was doing while waiting for me, he would say fishing to my horror…then he would say he’s just joking…hehehe… Marc thought I was weird to meditate there and I never told Marc what I was meditating on…but Marc being a good sport was really ok…
I would sit under the shade of the tree at the edge of the lake. I would pretend/visualize I was a hermit or yogi. I would in my mind’s eye stare out into the brilliant waters that was actually in front of me… From the centre of the lake in my imaginations, a Four Armed Avalokiteshvara (Lokeshvara) would be under the water sitting on a lotus calmly. I would chant Om Mani Peme Hung and ‘call’ to Him. He would hear me and very slowly rise out of the water. It was a gentle rising. As He rose, the waters would slowly cascade off of Him and he would be dry. His holy face would be facing down with four arms as He rose… His left hand held a mala (from our side), right hand a lotus and two hands folded at his heart with a wishfulfilling jewel. His majestic black hair would cascade down his shoulders and the other half tied up on his head bejewelled. He would wear princely silken clothes covering partially the upper portion of His body and a silk skirt the bottom. He would be sitting in full lotus posture on top of a gentle large brilliant pink lotus. His body was white like yoghurt/snow and shiny and brilliant. Millions of light rays would shine out from His holy body suffusing the area and me.. I would do this visualization and hold it. I would recite His mantra furiously and pray to be in communion with Him. To be blessed and one with Him. As I did this, I would visualize His face very very slowly looking up and then facing me. His face was like a polished mirror with the sun reflecting from it….it was so bright that I could hardly look into it. When he faced me from the middle of the lake and I saw His holy face directly gentle, calm and perfect, I would be filled with happiness, tingles all over my body, joy, forgiveness and I had no problems. I would ‘feel’ lights from His face shining directly towards me and filling my body and I would tingle all over. I would sometimes be in tears as I ‘communed’ with the Arya Lokeshvara, the Mahasattva of Great Compassion in this way… I wanted to be like Him, full of love, compassion, forgiveness, courage and acceptance. As the light shone from His holy visage to me, I would chant His mantra and hold this visualization as long as I can. I was around 11-12 years old at the time I think….
It was rare to get Dharma that time, but I was lucky. I made up the whole Lokeshvara meditation and did it for years over and over…..and I did it again and again at Turkey Swamp. My sole reason of going to Turkey Swamp was to engage in meditation on Lokeshvara. I also did the same meditation at home very often. When I read this book DOORWAY TO LIBERATION by Geshe Wangyal (borrowed this book from Anila Thupten Chonyid down the street), he described the qualities of compassion of Avalokitesvara…when I read this I could not stop crying. I FELT AT THE MOMENT, the true purpose of dharma was to develop unaffected true compassion in the face of good and harm. I reflected how the kids at school use to tease me about being Asian and my mother’s abuse, I would practice forgiveness and compassion towards them.. I use to walk around the school ‘absorbing’ the many racial slanders directed at me by being calm and focusing on Lokeshvara. I did sometimes lose it and retort back of course. I wasn’t holy…hehehe…At the same time, when my mother slapped me continuously very hard with her rings on when in her foul moods, I would silently chant Om Mani Peme Hung…close my eyes and not get angry at her. She asked me once when she was slapping me what I was saying under my breath. She said I was ‘cursing’ her to get sick or something…I said no, I was reciting Om Mani Peme Hung for her…she got even angrier..Next time I didn’t tell her what I was chanting when she did what she did…. The thought of compassion really touched me very deeply.
In 1979, when I was 14, His Holiness the Dalai Lama visited New Jersey for the first time ever. He gave teachings on the 8 VERSES OF THOUGHT TRANSFORMATION and the Om Mani Peme Hung mantra transmission I was blown away. The discourse was in Washington, New Jersey at a Kalmuk Dharma Centre by Geshe Wangyal and I ATTENDED WITH ALL THE OTHER KALMUKS!!!!! It was three hours of blissful discourse. I cried throughout the whole teaching having problems wiping my snots away… We were given the 8 Verses to recite daily on paper and I recited it daily. I had painted a 4-armed Avalokitesvara with my prayers written carefully at the back weeks prior. After the teachings, we had a short private audience with His Holiness the Dalai Lama and I offered this painting to Him DIRECTLY and He read the back!!!! I wrote on the back of the painting to become just like Him and to achieve great compassion and that in every life I can be near Him. He gave me a blessed red string and I wore that around my neck until it was worn out. But I was even more determined to practice this teaching. Even now, the 8 Verses are my favorite..it is something I encourage in Kechara now with my students.
Lokeshvara appealed to me as a kid because He always prayed to be born among the worse, barabaric people, worse conditions, and worse regions so he can benefit the beings of that region. No one else would have the courage to wish to be born in unpleasant and ugly circumstances with many difficult to tame people. He felt compassion for the lowest of the low and wished to be with them to benefit them… But Lokeshvara would alway pray that way to be within the harshest of environments. I was moved by that when I read it. I cried for days thinking of Lokeshvara’s courage to pray for this. I wished to be just like Him. It took me a short time to develop such courage to pray to be born among the most difficult people and circumstances so I can bring them the dharma. But I worked my mind into it and was finally able to do it in my meditations. I was actually able to really genuinely pray to always take rebirth in horrible situations with the most difficult of people and by living with them, gain their trust and bring them the dharma. I was very pleased with myself as a kid I remember because I did that. As a child, kindness and courage always appealed to me very deeply…. Every time I meditated and prayed to Lokeshvara I would cry and cry uncontrollably. I was afraid the prayers would come true and at the same time, I know I ‘needed’ to do that. I know that if I wanted to be truly spiritual I must wish the worst for myself and the best for others. I resolved to develop great compassion and a forgiving heart at home and in Turkey Swamp while reciting Om Mani Peme Hung …I really did make prayers to Avalokitesvara like that. I would hide in my bedroom daily and do His mantra. I knew other mantras but I liked Lokeshvara’s and Manjushri’s mantra the best….I memorized Tara’s 21 various mantras I found in a book because I felt when I grew older I would be in distant lands being requested to help people. So if I knew various mantras, I can alleviate the various problems people would have and seek my help for. Of course it was all in my fantasy mind but I still worked hard at studying the Dharma from books I borrowed from Anila Thupten Chonyid (she lived down the street) and memorizing mantras. I ‘knew’ I would need them later. I knew I would not be in the USA when I grew up. I didn’t know where I’d be, but it was not in the USA for sure I use to think. I would never voice this ever to my parents…..
In my bedroom I would sometimes recite Lokeshvara’s mantra 1,000 times, 10,000 or whatever I had time for as it had to be done covertly. My parents had gone to a party and I was lucky to stay home (usually I would be dragged to one of those parties in a suit and tie and hated it) so I lit incense, a butterlamp and recited Lokeshvara’s mantra in the darkness of my bedroom on my bed…that night I was able to do 40,000 I remembered. I stopped because I was at it for most of the night and was getting sleepy…but very happy with myself. I felt I had done something useful.
Whenever my mom beat me, accuse me, threaten me, I would focus on Lokeshvara and forgive her. I would do my best not to get angry with her and let it go. The beatings, punishments, violence and threats became much more as I grew older because my poor mom’s schizophrenia became worse and untreated. She was not evil just overwhelmed by a horrible mental disease left untreated. I used to feel so sorry for her and loved her and at the same time be very frightened of her….. My mom would sometimes threaten to stab me with a knife while I was sleeping and my bedroom door was not allowed to ever be closed or locked. It was her rule and I had to abide. If my door was closed, she would storm in and raid my drawers and question what I was doing. She threatened to physically kill me on many occasions and going to bed at night I would have a hard time falling asleep because I thought she’d be coming to my room with a knife. She used to graphically describe to me how she would stab me…. I believed her and was frightened but there was no one to tell. So I just stayed quiet. I prayed. I didn’t pray to escape my parents, my deep spirituality was something in me very deep even before the abuse….But my parents knowing I wanted to become a monk, it further irritated them and further irritated my mom’s anger and ‘stirred’ her illness and paranoia. Poor lady. I love her and always will…I have no ill will towards her and I miss her.
Turkey Swamp holds such beautiful memories for me. Memories of meditations, my good friend Marc, Lokeshvara and pretending to be a meditation yogi in the forest. I always ran away to the forest to meditate as a kid. We had quite a few wooded areas around in Howell, New Jersey where I grew up.
I am so glad our TSEM RINPOCHE BIO RESEARCH TEAM went to Turkey Swamp with Marc who took them there….seeing them there brought back vivid memories of a strange kid who meditated by its lakes and wished to achieve Nirvana so badly or at least communion with Lord Avalokiteshvara.
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观音菩萨、火鸡沼泽公园、马克和我
火鸡沼泽公园（Turkey Swamp）是个拥有巨大湖泊的大公园。距离我儿时新泽西的住家约三小时的单车路程。若驾驶汽车前往则需45分钟或更久。我的其中一名亲戚曾带我到那儿，我小时候很爱这个地方。当时我邀请儿时伙伴马克里德跟我一块儿骑车前往这里，他立刻就答应了。他是一个喜欢户外活动的人，人很强壮、精力充沛，还喜欢尝试各种体能活动，于是我跟马克就出发了。对于一个孩子来说，这是一个漫长且极耗体力的二至三小时的单车程，但那都还可以。我绝不会告诉父母我到那儿去。他们若知道我骑车到那么远的地方，一定会大惊失色。如果让他们知道我到那儿去是为了祈愿，那就更不得了，哈哈。
抵达那儿之后，我们会在周围散散步，然后我会叫马克自由活动，而我则想要独自静坐冥想。马克是个很随和兼善良，也有些诙谐的人。他常会答应我的请求（谢谢你，马克！感谢你的友谊。）他会让自己在人多的公园一角忙着，而让我独自呆在安静的角落。几个小时后，当我已经完成了要做的事，他就会回来找我。当我问起他在等我的那几个小时内都在忙些什么的时候，他会回答说自己在钓鱼，这常让我大吃一惊。这时，他就会告诉我他只是在开玩笑，嘿嘿！马克认为我静坐冥想的做法很奇怪，而我从来不曾告诉他我在冥想些什么。无可否认，马克确实是个很大方的人。
我会坐在湖边的树荫下，假装/观想自己是个隐士或瑜伽士。我会使用心灵的眼睛望向前方的湖水，并想象在湖中央的水面下，有一尊安坐在莲座上的四臂观音菩萨。当我念诵“唵嘛呢叭咪吽”呼唤祂时，祂就会因我的呼唤而缓缓浮上水面。浮出水面时，水从祂身上滑落，不留下任何水迹。当祂升起时，祂神圣的脸孔望向下方……祂的左手（我们望过去的方向）持着一串念珠，右手持一朵莲花，双手合十于心前持握如意宝。祂庄严的黑发披泻在肩上，另一半则盘起并饰以宝石。祂上半身穿着绸缎制成的王子服饰，下半身穿着丝裙，结跏趺坐在一朵巨大的粉红莲花上。祂的身体洁白如雪，晶莹透亮。从祂身上发出万道光芒，穿透整个地区也穿透我。我如此观想，同时努力持诵祂的心咒，祈愿自己能与祂交融，并接受祂的加持，与祂合为一体。这么做的时候，我会观想祂慢慢抬起头看着我。祂的脸孔就像一面擦亮了的镜子，阳光在上方形成反射……太亮了，让我无法直视。当祂从湖中央看着我的时候，其神圣的脸孔显得十分温和、平静及完美。那时候，我浸浴在快乐之中，全身颤抖，充满了愉悦和宽容，一切问题都消失了。我感觉到祂脸孔散发的光芒向我直射，填满我的身体，让我颤抖。与观音菩萨，伟大的慈悲佛交融的时刻，往往让我禁不住流泪。我希望自己也能像祂一样，充满爱、慈悲、宽恕、勇气及接纳。当光从祂神圣的脸庞射向我的时候，我就会持诵祂的心咒，并尽可能让自己守在这个观想里头。没记错的话，当时的我约11-12岁。
在当时，想要学习佛法是很困难的，但我很幸运，我不但完成了观音菩萨禅修，且还持续了许多年。我在火鸡沼泽公园一次又一次地完成了这个禅修。我到火鸡沼泽公园的唯一目的就是完成观音菩萨禅修。我在家里也常常这么做。我在阅读格西旺克所著的《解脱之门》（我跟邻居杜登章依阿妮拉借的书）时……他描述了观音菩萨的慈悲……读到这些总是让我无法停止哭泣。当时，我感觉到佛法真正的目的，就是培养出一颗真正的慈悲心，全然不被情况的好坏所左右。当我想起学校里的孩子们如何嘲笑我的亚洲人身份，以及母亲如何虐待我时，我就决定原谅他们，并以慈悲心对待他们。我曾在校园里走动，“吸收”许多冲着我而来的种族诋毁，而我始终保持平静，一心只是专注于观音菩萨。当然，有时候我也会失控，并反唇相讥。毕竟，我还不是个圣人，嘿嘿。当母亲心情不好，以她带着戒指的手不停地掌掴我时，我会默默持诵“唵嘛呢叭咪吽”并闭上眼睛，不让自己对她生起愤怒之心。有一次，她在掌掴我的时候，问我喃喃自语些什么。她说我在“诅咒”她得病或其他东西。当我回答说“不是”，而只是在念诵“唵嘛呢叭咪吽”时，她变得更为愤怒。后来当她这么做的时候， 我就再也没告诉她自己在念诵些什么了。这个关于慈悲的想法真是深深触动了我。
1979年，在我14岁那年，至尊达赖喇嘛第一次探访新泽西。他给了一个关于《修心八颂》的开示，并授予《唵嘛呢叭咪吽》口传，这让我雀跃万分。我跟其他所有的卡尔梅克人共同参加了这个位于新泽西州华盛顿，格西旺克的卡尔梅克佛教中心所举办的佛法开示！！这是充满法喜的三小时开示。我全程都在哭泣，连鼻涕都来不及抹干。我们都得到了一份印在纸上的《修心八颂》，我每天都会念诵它。在几个星期前，我画了一幅四臂观音菩萨像，并在纸的后方写上了祈愿文。开示结束后，我们跟至尊达赖喇嘛有个简短的会面。那时候，我就亲手将这幅画交给他，他还读了后面的文字！我在图画的后方写着希望自己也能像他一样，成就大慈悲心，并祈愿生生世世都能接近他。他给了我一条红绳，我将它戴在颈上，直到绳子断了为止。自那时起，我更坚定地想要修持这个教诲。甚至到了今天，《修心八颂》依然是我的最爱。这也是现在我鼓励克切拉弟子们修持的教诲。
自小，我就深深被观音菩萨所吸引，因为祂时常祈愿出生在最恶劣的环境和地区，跟最野蛮、最差劲的人为伍，好让自己可以为这些地区的人们带来福祉。没有什么人拥有这份勇气，希望自己能出生于最不舒服兼丑陋的环境，跟许多难以驯服的人相处。祂对那些最卑劣的人怀有慈悲心，希望能跟他们一起，并利惠他们。观音菩萨时常祈愿生在最苛刻艰难的环境。当我读到这些时，我很感动。我连续哭了几天，一直想着观音菩萨立这个愿时所需要的勇气。我希望自己能像祂一样。我用了短时间来培养出这种勇气，祈愿自己能生长在最恶劣的人与环境之间，好让我可以把佛法带给他们。 我为自己做好思想建设，最后终于能够把它融入我的禅修当中。事实上，我也能够真诚地祈愿自己不断投生在可怕的环境，跟最麻烦的人一起生活，然后再透过相处来赢得他们的信任，继而把佛法带给他们。我记得，当时还是孩子的我，对自己能够这么做感到很满意。自小，我一直都被良善和勇气深深吸引。每次对观音菩萨祈愿和禅修时，我都会无法克制地哭泣。我很怕祈愿会成真，同时却又知道我“必须”这么做。我知道如果想要真正去实践佛法，我就必须希望把最坏的留给自己，而把最好的都给他人。我在家中和火鸡沼泽公园念诵“唵嘛呢叭咪吽”时，下定决心要培养出一颗慈悲和宽容的心。我真的对观音菩萨如此祈愿。我每天都会在房里念诵祂的心咒。我懂得其他心咒，但最爱的还是观音菩萨和文殊菩萨的心咒。我在一本书中找到了21度母的心咒，并把它们背起来，因为我觉得自己长大之后，将会被要求到一个遥远的地方去帮助他人。如果我学会许多心咒，我就能够减轻那些前来向我求助的人的问题。当然，那都是我的幻想，但我依然努力从那些跟杜登章依阿妮拉（她就住在同一条街）借的书中吸收佛法知识，同时背诵心咒。我“知道”自己有一天一定会需要它们。我知道自己长大后将不会留在美国。虽然我不知道自己会到什么地方，但肯定不会在美国，这是我想过的。我绝不会向父母透露这些……
我有时会在房里念诵观音菩萨心咒一千次、一万次，或任何可能的次数，视情况而定，因为我必须躲起来偷偷念诵。我父母到一个聚会去了，我很幸运地可以呆在家里（通常我都会被逼穿着西装，打起领带一起出席这些聚会，而我对此十分厌恶。），所以我就点燃一根香和一盏酥油灯，在黑暗房间的床上念诵观音菩萨心咒。那个晚上，我记得自己共念诵了四万次心咒。我一整夜都这么做，直到累了才停止。我对自己感到满意，因为我觉得自己做了一些有意义的事。
每当母亲殴打我、怪罪我、恐吓我时，我都会专注于观音菩萨并原谅她。我会尽最大的努力不去生气她，并让它过去。当我逐渐长大之后，这些殴打、惩罚、暴力和恐吓更是变本加厉，那是因为我可怜的母亲的精神分裂症已经越来越严重，却没去接受治疗。她并不是邪恶的人，只不过被可怕的精神疾病所累，却没获得治疗。我曾为她感到十分难过，我也爱她，同时却十分畏惧她。我母亲曾经威胁说会在我入睡时，用刀子来刺我。她还不允许我关上或锁上房门。这是她立下的规矩，我必须遵守。如果我关上房门，她就会冲入我房里，检查我的抽屉，并盘问我正在做些什么。她多次威胁说将会把我杀死，造成我夜里上床后很难入睡，我一直担心她会持着刀子冲进来。她曾经绘声绘影地描述自己将会如何杀死我。我相信她所说的，也感到非常害怕，却找不到一个可以倾诉的人。所以，我只好保持沉默。我只能祈愿。我祈愿，并不是为了逃离父母，而是因为深藏在我心底对寻求灵修的渴望，这在我被虐待之前就已经如此。然而，我深知自己想要出家为僧的念头，只会更进一步激怒我的父母，尤其是激起母亲的愤怒，继而激发她的疾病和偏执。可怜的女人，我爱她，一直都是……我对她没有任何恶意，我想念她。
火鸡沼泽公园有着我美丽的回忆。那是关于禅修、好友马克、观音菩萨，以及假装自己是一位在森林中修行的瑜伽士的回忆。在孩提时代，我时常跑到森林去禅修。在我成长的新泽西豪威尔市里头，有着好一些树林区。
我很高兴詹仁波切传记查访小组在马克里德的带领下去了一趟火鸡沼泽公园……看到他们在那里，勾起我儿时在湖边静坐，热切希望达到涅磐或至少能与观音菩萨沟通的回忆。
Ruby with her two daughters at Turkey Swamp.
林秀月和她的两名女儿在火鸡沼泽公园的合影
Marc even after 30 years remembers where we use to go in Turkey Swamp and the spots I chose for meditation. Marc was very helpful to our TSEM RINPOCHE BIO TEAM with information. He even took our team to Turkey Swamp which is quite a distance a way. Here he is with our team describing what he remembered.
马克里德在30年后仍然记得火鸡沼泽公园里那些我们曾经到过的地方，以及我选择静坐的地点。马克里德非常乐意与詹仁波切传记查访小组分享资料。他甚至带领我们的查访小组前往偏远的火鸡沼泽公园。他就在这里和我们的查访小组形容他所记得的事物
Walking through the wooded areas of Turkey Swamp. I loved it…
走过火鸡沼泽公园的树林区。我喜欢那么做……
Maybe she saw a mutant Turkey???
难道她看见一只变种火鸡？？？
Su Ming the Turkey Nature girl????
诗明是具有火鸡气质的女孩？？？？
Dee Dee leading the group with Cameraman Patrick close behind…Patrick looks super cool like a Shaolin Master….
Dee Dee走在前头，摄影师帕特里克紧随在后……帕特里克酷得像少林寺大师
JP ever glamorous with his Jackie O’ sunglasses and no doubt sunscreen smeared generously all over his face and hands…hehe
戴着杰奎琳(Jackie O)的太阳眼镜的董俊鹏一如既往的迷人。不用怀疑，他肯定在脸上和双手都满满地涂上了大量的防晒油。嘿嘿
Marc Reed (centre) is my childhood friend. I used to go with Marc by bicycle to Turkey Swamp. He is very adventurous and love to do outdoor things. He took our Bio team to Turkey Swamp.
马克里德（中）是我的儿时玩伴。过去我经常与他骑单车到火鸡沼泽公园。他是一个富冒险精神及酷爱室外活动的人。他带领我们的查访小组到火鸡沼泽公园
Fantastic..this is one of the spots I used to meditate at……after riding on my bike with Marc for 3 hours to get there.
Once I got there, I would spend at least two hours meditating on Avalokitesvara combined with mantras. Marc would patiently hang out at another part of the Park keeping himself busy…Marc is very patient.
太好了！这就是我常打坐的地点之一……我和马克里德踩了三小时的单车才能抵达那里
我一抵达那里，便会花上至少两个小时的时间进行观音菩萨禅修和持诵心咒。马克则会很有耐心地让自己在公园一角忙着。马克是个非常有耐心的人
Our team look like a bunch of Sasquatch researchers gathering data of footprints and hair left on branches..
我们的查访小组像是一班研究野人的人员，收集有关脚印和树枝上的残发的资料
Another spot at that I meditated at……Beautiful isn’t it?
I remember Turkey Swamp being serene with ducks. I loved going there. I would meditate for hours while reciting Om Mani Peme Hung into the thousands. I never wanted to leave. I loved the place as a kid. I love the water, trees, blue sky and the feeling that I was practicing dharma in the forest. My dream to practice dharma alone in the mountains and forests with a lake nearby. What I always imagined spontaneously in my mind since very young.
我打坐的另一处……景色宜人吧？
我记得火鸡沼泽公园里有多只鸭子点缀那儿的平静气氛。我非常喜欢去那里。我会在那里打坐并持诵上千次唵嘛呢叭咪吽。我从不想离开那里，我还是名孩子的时候就很喜欢那里。我喜欢那里的湖水、树林、蓝天，我喜欢在森林修行的感觉。我的梦想是独自一人在山林和树林间，靠湖的地点修行佛法。这是自小就经常会在我脑海中浮现的东西
I love the forests. I hated leaving Turkey Swamp to go home. I would never tell my parents I went there and what I did. It would be a huge drama if I did. I always went there without them knowing. And practicing dharma had to be a big secret kept from them AT ALL TIMES…
我爱这片树林。我讨厌离开火鸡沼泽公园而回家。我从来不告诉我的父母我到过那里和做了什么。如果我告诉他们，那将会上演一场六国大封相。我经常不动声色地去到那里。而修行佛法一直都必须是隐瞒着他们的大秘密
Well, Turkey Swamp still looks pristine after 30 years and it was certainly nice to see my friends/students there. I thank everyone for the pictures. I again thank Marc to share so much with our group.
Tsem Rinpoche
P.S. Marc and I use to hang out alot. Marc is a VERY VERY VERY GOOD ARTIST WITH NATURAL UNTRAINED TALENT. We use to hang out together and listen to Heart and paint. I would ask Marc to paint a lot of Hippie scene pictures for me..I wish I still had them. I would tell him the scene I’d wanted and he’d paint it. I loved hippies because they were free, renounced and into Eastern Mysticism in my mind which is what I liked. I told Marc I was born too late and I wanted to be a hippie and live in a commune & practice dharma….Marc would just stare at me and tell me I was very strange…LOL…But he would paint for me and his paintings are really good. Sometimes I hang out at his house with other neighbour kids and they’d play volleyball and I would be the referee because if the ball fell on a questionable spot, I would be called upon to say in or out. Marc told them that I never lied…so can trust my judgement…Marc and I went to the same school also….same class. He is a very talented writer and poet. I use to admire his writings in Ms Bohen’s English class. Marc was a very good writer.
火鸡沼泽公园历经30年后仍然保存原有的面貌。看到我的朋友和弟子在那里我感到非常开心。我感谢每个人拍下这些照片。我再一次感谢马克里德对我们查访小组的大方分享。
詹仁波切
注：我和马克里德经常结伴外出。马克里德是一名极为出色且很有天赋的艺术家。我们经常结伴外出，听红心乐团（Heart乐团）的歌曲并一起画画。我会要求马克里德画很多副嬉皮式的图画给我……我希望我还留着这些画。我会告诉他我要什么样的图画，而他就照着画。我喜欢嬉皮士，因为在我的脑海中，他们不但自由，具有出离心，还倾向我所喜爱的东方神秘主义。我告诉马克，我出生得太晚了，我希望能当一名嬉皮士，并住在一个公社中，然后修学佛法。马克只是看着我，然后说我非常奇特……哈哈哈哈！但是他会为我画画，他的作品都非常棒。有些时候我会去他家里和其他邻居的小孩一起玩。他们会打排球而我则充当裁判员，当球跌在有争议性的位置时，我就会被叫去裁决球是否出界。马克告诉他们说我从不说谎，所以我的判决是可信的。马克里德和我上同样的学校，还是同班同学。他在写作和题诗这方面非常有才华。过去在博翰小姐的英语课上，我非常欣赏他的文笔。马克里德是一位非常优秀的作家。
Marc sent this photo to me when over two decades ago…it ‘s funny because in California, my first car was a Volkswagon Bug also….
20年前，马克里德将这张照片寄给我。这非常有趣，因为我在加利福尼亚州时拥有的第一辆车子，也是福士伟根（Volkswagen）的甲虫车
Dear Tsem Tulku Rinpoche !!!
Thank you for this inspiring post. I still have lots of work to do to develop genuine compassion. Thank you for your inspiration !!!
And a lot of good energies for your precious Dharma work !!!
Christoph
I love this post…ok, all of Rinpoche’s blog posts. This posts vividly shows how Rinpoche’s highly attained mind was even as a young child. How many kids have we come across who’d be engaged in meditations and the activities which Rinpoche was passionate about. The consistency in spiritualism, in his deep interest in dharma, in compassionate qualities, in living the essence of dharma as a child and now is the same…it’s like a stream which continuously flows..
The bio team has brought back so much of Rinpoche’s past for us. Recollection of Rinpoche’s past serves to reinforce the qualities Rinpoche have always had…Tulkus are beings whom out of great compassion, returns again and again to show us by example, how to learn, how to apply, how to live the buddhist path.
Rinpoche, thank you for writing in such detail what Rinpoche was like as a child. I know it will inspire so many on to the path as it has for me.
much gratitude
susan
Dear Susan,
Thank you for your sincere comments. I was very touched by what you wrote. Remember I care about you no matter what.. Let’s go to the end together with our spiritual goals. Tsem Rinpoche
Dear Rinpoche,
This is a beautiful post of the days from your younger years. The life you have led carries with it some important and valuable lessons, namely that compassion should be practiced in even the most difficult of circumstances.
Anyone who faced such difficult times would have every right to curl up into a ball and ask, “Why me?”, but the inspiration for us all lies in the fact that despite any hardships you have faced, you’ve not only forgiven those who have harmed you in some way, but you’ve also managed to so much good and not let the bad times affect you to any great extent and of course, the work you do continues to benefit many.
Through your example and your teachings, I am gradually learning to “let go” and be as positive as I can – especially when difficulties arise. It’s not easy by any means, but you’ve helped me to realise that everyone gets cheated or hurt or loses people they love or gets betrayed etc…there is no a problem we suffer that’s unique to ourselves.
Having realised this, there’s a choice to make. Either we can make excuses and say “poor me”, or we can use our experiences to practice, learn and grow. Common sense tells us which path is best to take.
Thank you for this post, Rinpoche. It’s a genuine pleasure to gain insight into the life of such a tremendous teacher.
With warmest regards and gratitude,
Sandy
Dear Rinpoche, its hard not to feel pure tenderness reading this post. And its easy to see the merciful Avalokiteshvara in you and all that you do. With permission, I shall copy this post and reprint it, so I know where to go when the chips are down.
To what do we owe the opportunity to be in your presence and be your students. We certainly didn’t earn it and I can onlt think that we are all here by the grace of Avalokiteshvara.
Thank you.
My dear Martin,
I’ve not known you long, and I know you are not perfect just like me and everyone, but what I have seen of you so far, I LIKE VERY MUCH.
Practice compassion, forgiveness and letting things go everywhere especially with the people who are difficult. The best way to help others is for ourselves to be a shining example. Work on that with me. I am working on that within myself. I want you to go all the way with me to the end of our Kecharian goals. You fit the bill, you fit the character and you have the depth of thought to think things very indepth to go all the way with big works that benefit people on a very deep and subtle level….
I like you.
Of course you may duplicate or do as you like with my writing. It’s to share with everyone.
Remember, whatever comes to us should not dishearten us because nothing comes to us without us HAVING INITIALLY CREATING THE KARMIC CAUSES. So be patient with everyone especially yourself.
My good wishes and fond prayers for you,
Tsem Rinpoche
Hi Rinpoche! I am not sure if you do it on purpose, but I can tell that there are messages in each and every blog post that you write.
Or maybe it is just myself. Each time I read your blog I will realized that there is something that I am not doing right or can do better. They say a picture paints a thousand words. I say Rinpoche’s blog paints a BILLION MEANINGFUL WORDS!
Thank you once again for all your wonderful blog postings.
Hi Rinpoche! I’m sorry you were hurt so much when you were a child. But I’m glad everything is better now.
Your first Tibet Buddhism goddess was Lokeshvara 観音 but later you choose Varajogini. I hope you will write about her and why you choose her over all the other ones. I know you drew visions of her as a boy. Did you decide already then, or when you go to India.
P.S. Thank you for your answer yesterday! I got the book Wheel of sharp Weapon and it is about Yamatake who you write about before in LA. I will try to be vegitarianism but I live with my family and it is hard. I’m sorry there are no good lama Buddhism temples here in Taiwan but maybe can take care of dogs not wanted, can start Tsem Tulky Kechara center later. God bless! Sorry my English is not good.
Thank you Rinpoche for such a detailed post of your early years. Even at such young age Rinpoche had such a strong inclination towards spirituality and also have great compassion. Through so much sufferings and abused and beaten up by your mum, you have stayed strong. I loved Rinpoche’s visualisation on Avalokiteshvara and I can understand why Rinpoche loved Turkey Swamp. That place is so beautiful and serene. I am so glad that Rinpoche had a friend like Marc to hang out with during those difficult times.
I thank the bio research team for doing an excellent job in bringing back fond memories of Rinpoche’s childhood. Rinpoche’s life is an inspiration for all of us to follow.
Dear Rinpoche,
thank you for sharing the wonderful practice of Avalokiteshvara you did near the lake. It is such a beautiful created ✿ܓ of ☮☀❤❤❤☀☮ in a very difficult situation. A great inspiration!
Dear Rinpoche,
I just don’t know what to say about this amazing and beautiful description of Lokeshvara. I just love how you described Lokeshvara. It’s as if you’re like J.K. Rowling. You’ve just triggered that imagination and visualisation for me. Thank you so much, Rinpoche. You’ve made it so much easier for me to visualise Lokeshvara now when I chant ‘Om Mani Peme Hung’. And when I read how you were being treated when you were young by your mom, I could almost ‘feel’ it . How scared you were, worrying she may go into your room to kill you .
Rinpoche,thank you so much for sending these messages across. Everyday I learn things from you and I truly appreciate you taking your time to reach out to us all. With much gratitude, Nicole.
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you for this post and for all the sharings – there are some stories and insights that I have had the privilege of hearing from Rinpoche before but each time I hear or read them, it is like hearing them from the first time: A new teaching, a new story all over again.
It is exceptionally special reading this post now after having been so so privileged to have met your good friend Marc, walk the same steps down Turkey Swamp and meet all the people who knew you, Rinpoche.
The Avalokiteshvara meditations that Rinpoche has described – praying to be born in dark places, forgiveness, the 8 verses – were so alive in every interview that we did. Rinpoche was living everything you were meditating upon.
Friends shared that no matter how much kids bullied Rinpoche in school, he would still turn around and help them if they needed. Of all the 25+ people we interviewed, every single person cannot recall Rinpoche ever speaking badly or sadly about his parents or about the difficulties at home. Instead, they have only happy memories of Rinpoche – smiling, playing, looking out for them, finding ways of making them happy. There’s all the “evidence” we need that Avalokiteshvara, and all he represents, exists.
Thank you Rinpoche, for showing us the living Avalokiteshvara – in Turkey Swamp, at every single place you visited and in every single person who knew and loved you.
PS Anila Carmen Thubten Chonyid shared with us that a naga resides in Turkey Swamp which is just amazing since nagas are apparently closely related/connected to Avalokiteshvara.
upon making the connection, I exclaimed to Anila, “Oh, and that’s where Rinpoche used to do many meditations on Avalokiteshvara!”
Anila then said, “Yes, you don’t know who it was who came first!” I like to think the naga came after and because of Rinpoche and the Avalokiteshvara meditations!
Dear Rinpoche ,
I always wonder how come , why a young kid like yourself back then with so much suffering around you BUT still able to achieve what you have today. Because of this posting and the previous posting and smses from the bio team i can fully grasp it now. I find it is so inspiring and you have so much strong faith in the Dharma that pushes you all the way.
I am so so glad , happy and joyful to have come in contact with you. Reading your blog almost on a daily basis no matter where i am always make my day better. Its such a relieve to have a sanctuary we can all go to. I wish and hope i can do more to repay you kindness. Thank you very much.
Reading this blog is teaching me so much about compassion and forgiveness. Very poignant and profound. I keep wanting to read it again and again to wake myself up each time a little more from my deep sleep. Oh thank you so much Rinpoche for taking the time to write for us to help us and guide us on our path.
Thank you for the Bio Team for their excellent work together and for Marc to be so caring and patient. I love this blog very much and I am grateful for it with my deepest respect.
Dear Rinpoche, thank you for the detailed description of how you prayed and visualised Lokeshvara. It is very useful and helpful to me as visualisation is so important but as a newbie, something i must learn to get it right. Om Mani Peme Hung was the first mantra i learned, its easy, catchy too if sung. As i read about your wish as a kid to be like Lokeshvara to be reborn in the most difficult circumstances, i am deeply humbled as my daily mundane thoughts are nowhere at that level. I love this blog very much as it is a daily reminder to me that there is so much more that i need to learn, assimilate and put to practice. And the daily question and answer column, thats so fantastic.
with folded hands
janice
Thank you Rinpoche for the sharing. I like to read Rinpoche’s childhood stories so much, the stories show how strong and tough Rinpoche’s mind is even in a very very bad condition.
While watching the footage from the Bio Team, I have a strong feeling as if i am watching the movie, The Big Fish, which Rinpoche told us stories, and the Bio team witness them one by one like completing jigsaw puzzle. And all the stories are very inspiring.
The Bio Team is doing a good job! Can’t wait for the books and videos!
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank for this amazing recollection of your childhood experience. It poignant and a powerful reminder of the power of compassion. I can’t imagine how I would be if I were your age and going through all that you were going through. I probably wouldn’t have made it like you did.
There is much to be inspired and I just can’t wait for the full biography of your life. I suppose there will be a video documentary coming out on Rinpoche’s life and a written biography. I can’t wait! I am sure Paris and Sharon would do a great job relating Rinpoche’s life once they have been there and witnessing all the facts, people and places. This is surely going to be great!
Through my observation and experience with Dharma from my friends. I notice many people chant OM MANI PADME HUM first before they learn about deities. But Rinpoche is very different. At a very young age he could visualise the Four Armed Chenresig. He is very lucky to have Marc Reed who is very understanding to accompany him often to Turkey swamp then wait for him to finish his meditation and prayers. Rinpoche has been very Compassionate. And Chenresig being the Mother of Compassion appealed to him greatly. The when H.H.Dalal Lama came to visit U.S. Rinpoche took the opportunity to see him as he is the manifestation of Chenresig and is Rinpoche’s favourite Deity.
Rinpoche used to cycle for 3hrs just to meditate in a clean & quite place! Wow! Even when I was a kid, cycle to a market place 1km away from my home to buy newspaper/magazine already drove me crazy. I feel ashamed compare with Rinpoche. Have to exercise more to gain more stamina.
The most difficult part always is to give others all goodness including all your merits and to take all the harm including the bad karma… really who else could ever do that but the Bodhisattvas… and even so, a really brave bodhisattva.
When i read that Lama Zopa as a young practitioner also managed to genuinely generate the wish to be reborn into the hot hells instantly for sentient beings… i could not even conceive of it… that Buddha gave his body to a tigress.. such courage!
the most powerful force that can move anyone’s mind in the world always is the great compassion…
thank you for sharing your experiences of practising bodhichitta, i think truly it is the most difficult thing to develop, yet the most important n worthwhile thing to develop prior to emptiness.
i pray and wish that i and all practitioners and all beings will be able to really change our mind into bodhichitta.
Dear Rinpoche, thanks so much for taking time to share your childhood life at Turkey Swamp, teaching us compassion and to forgive. Our sufferings compared to Rinpoche’s is nothing.
It’s very inspiring and there’s so much to learn from every of your blog postings.
Also thanks to the Bio Team for all their dedicated work in making a biography of Rinpoche possible. I can’t wait! With deepest respect.
Dear Rinpoche,
When Rinpoche first told me about how Rinpoche would sit by the swamp and do Rinpoche’s detailed meditations on the Great Lord of Compassion Lokeshvara, it was the most lively and graphic visualizations which I have ever heard and now to read it again and again it gives me goose bumps to how Rinpoche would have done it. And to imagine that Rinpoche is able to see and explain the countenance of Lokeshwara so clearly, it clearly shows how accomplished Rinpoche in your meditations!
I am blessed by Rinpoche’s presence, teachings and care. May I learn and be like the Great Lokeshwara, emulate his deeds based on the 8 verses in order to repay your kindness.
Yes it was, a beetle I mean. You were so tall, you nearly diden’t almost fit in it HE HE
Rinpoche’s yearn to be surrounded by lush jungles amidst the sounds of nature will soon to be when we start planning for our retreat land. This place will provide many people to enter into retreats, weekends stay to relax, do some gardening, go for walks….
Another great article for Kechara Paradise staff quiz.
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing these memories and the beautiful pictures. Especially the great details in which Rinpoche describes the visualization of Lokeshvara.
It is already mind-blowing to me that Rinpoche at such a young age engaged in HOURS and HOURS of meditation and mantra recitation, but on top of that, biking 3 hours to find the right meditation spot shows the commitment, the drive, the effort, the focus, the determination! Very inspiring… I wish that the next time I am a young person I have the same drive too!
I am grateful to Marc for keeping Rinpoche company during these bike rides. I wish him well. Thank you Marc!
It is sad to hear such suffering story of Rinpoche, but I know Rinpoche didn’t write this out for a “poor me” reason.
Indeed, through genuine practice fo compassion, not only we can let go of our own suffering, we are able to let go the sufferings of other people.
I have watched many America movies where kids ride bicycle in the woods, I never know Rinpoche has done the same too!
Whenever I see that scene, I would always imagine myself doing that. Riding in the woods give me the calm and serenity feeling…
What is Marc doing now? Is he pursuing his art career?
Thank you Rinpoche for sharing this with us. This blog post to me is a teaching on generating Boddhicitta.
Rinpoche’s life has not been easy especially as a child. However, it was also because of the difficult situation that Rinpoche was able to practise “compassion”. It was the Avalokiteshvara teachings that helped Rinpoche getting over the difficult time and not feeling bitter. If we are also in a difficult situation, we can do what Rinpoche wrote here, his experience has proven to us that it worked!
To get the real benefits of Dharma, it is not about reading the text only, we have to meditate and contemplate. Results does not come immediately but through consistent practice.
I can’t imagine anybody would pray to take on difficult situations or have difficult people around oneself.
After reading this post, it no longer come as a surprise why Rinpoche is always so patient and kind with difficult people like us .
Only with years or life times of training can such compassion arise spontaneously in one’s heart. Om mani peme hung !
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you for this most compassionate post. You show, by your fine example and at such a young age, how to use the most painful of circumstances to develop compassion and practice the beautiful 8 verses of Thought Transformation.
It is painful to read about what you had to suffer at the hands of schoolmates and from your mother. I flinch at the cruel side of your mother, but in your loving and so caring way, you teach us what it means to be gentle and to let go.
At age 11 or 12, boys would be having fun and excitement, mostly in mischievous pursuits. But you were bent on Dharma and spiritual pursuits and with such great passion. Your meditation on Avalokiteshvara in Turkey Swamp is so beautiful and powerfully evocative of Lokeshvara’s great love and compassion.
But, above all, you have shown us how fortunate we are to have a Guru with such consistent and equal love and compassion for all.
Thank you Rinpoche for sharng with us your personal childhood and the difficulty Rinpoche had to face and go through to practice Dharma. It is inspiring because no matter what the difficulty and suffering, Rinpoche stayed true and persevered.
It also showed that Rinpoche’s strong imprint for Dharma was so prevalent even as a young child, Rinpoche was drawn to Dharma naturally. This must have come from the many previous lives of practising the Dharma/compassion, esp to have that type of compassionate thought, chanting Om Mani Pedme Hung, visualising Avaloketeshvara when Rinpoche was so young and when abused by Rinpoche’s mother and peers shows that Rinpoche is a no ordinary child. This I find inspiring because for most children would grow up with some sort of mental instability after going through so much suffering. Guess there must have been some truth to what Rinpoche’s mother said that if Rinpoche was a real Tulku of high incarnation, Rinpoche would naturally find the will and way back to Dharma and the rest is history…
Of all the places that was on our itinerary of US Biography trip, Turkey Swamp was the place that i looked forward to visiting the most as Rinpoche has recounted many stories relating to the place.
Marc also told us that during the gruelling bike ride there, you would encounter many fierce dogs. The dogs would bark and chase after you both. Marc said as a kid, he was terrified for fear of being biten just as most kids would. He said Rinpoche was different. Rinpoche would get down from the bike, chant some mantra (he said he didnt know what mantra) and did a hand mudra and the dogs would all be pacified. Till today, he is still intrigued. Perhaps it was Om Mani Padme Hung??
Dearest Rinpoche,
Thank you for this sharing about Rinpoche’s meditations at Turkey Swamp. Visiting Turkey Swamp was one of the highlights of the US Biography Trip because it was one place where Rinpoche had always said that Rinpoche found solace. It was actually so far from Howell, i think it was about 5 miles away. It’s amazing that Rinpoche would cycle that distance with Marc and friends! The place is beautiful and serene and when we walked through the forest i could imagine little Rinpoche walking through, looking for a quiet secluded spot by the lake to do Rinpoche’s meditations.
Thank you for sharing the vivid visualisation of Avalokiteshvara which Rinpoche meditated on. Nobody told Rinpoche to meditate like this so it must have come from Rinpoche’s previous lives of practice. The only things most kids would meditate on is what entertainment they can have! Rinpoche was really an extraordinary child. When we were at Turkey Swamp, i imagined what it was like for Rinpoche looking out to the lake and how Rinpoche visualised Avalokiteshvara rising out of the water as Rinpoche had told us before. Even though my imagination was nowhere near Rinpoche’s visualisation, it was quite emotional for me because i was also thinking of the background behind why Rinpoche came to Turkey Swamp – to get some peace and quiet away from Rinpoche’s foster parents who would not allow Rinpoche to practice.
Marc said that he would just leave Rinpoche alone to meditate while he went wandering around. I know Rinpoche has always dreamed of having a retreat in the forest near a lake and this sharing about Turkey Swamp shows that it is a dream Rinpoche has had from young.
We all have dreams of our dream place to live or visit but our reasons are usually very different. People want to live by the sea, or have a condo in the city… for reasons of the view etc, but RInpoche’s reasons for wanting to be in the forest is to meditate and do prayers. This consistent motivation which has driven Rinpoche’s entire life, no matter what the obstacles, is inspirational to all of us and I know this is why RInpoche’s Guru had advised us to publish Rinpoche’s life story. It is a great privilege to be on Rinpoche’s biography team and I look forward to the production of the movie of Rinpoche’s life in the near future as it will touch many people’s lives.
We were chasing after toys and pleasures while Rinpoche was meditating on Avalokiteshvara. Even though many of us have unpleasant young age but it makes me sad every time I have to read about it. What is our sadness compared to Rinpoche’s ‘sacrifice’ for the Dharma? Thank you for Rinpoche’s inspiration always….
PS. The description of the meditation was beautiful….
Turkey Swamp is so beautiful. Love the lake with the mountains in the background. Also Rinpoche would ride on the bicycle for 2-3 hours to get there and meditate shows how passionate Rinpoche is towards the practice. THank you Rinpoche for sharing a piece of your history and life with us to understand the struggles Rinpoche went through to get here.
Like the saying goes, “A picture is worth a thousand words”. Especially, the lovely Turkey Swamp, where Rinpoche as a kid used to go there to meditate for hours, with the recitation of “Om mani Padmi Hung” into thousands, while his best pal, Marc would patiently hang out at another part of the swamp park. Just to go there would take Rinpoche 3 hours ride on his bike together with Marc in secret. Nevertheless, Turkey Swamp holds so much beautiful memories for Rinpoche, inspite of so much restrictions, threats, punishments, violent beatings and threats of being knife to death when he goes to sleep! Like Susan said, Rinpoche’s past serves to reinforce the qualities of the ‘Tulkus’ who out of great compassion return again and again to show us by example, how to learn, apply and live the Buddhist path. Thank you Rinpoche for showing us the way through which many, many will be inspired to follow, you are truly a great compassion!
Dear Rinpoche,
This article is really about everything essential to practice mind transformation in the face of adversities.From basic faith in goodness and holiness of 3 jewels, having good motivation , to praying to have the compassionate qualities of a Buddha and putting undistracted effort to attaining them,its all here depicted in actual real life situations which we can all relate or had experienced but had failed to use them as oportunity to practice and transform.
This is 21st C commentary to the 8 verses with the additional bonus of inspiring us through the thoughts of an early teen how we can be holy too by emulating his examples when dealing with our problems in everyday life.
My impure mind have only fathomed a mere fraction of the above amazing teaching but will humbly share my thoughts with all in class and whoever I meet as I believe this has much more benefits than mere reading of the 8 verses.
Dear Rinpoche, What you are doing now is no difference of what Avalokiteshvara is. From my observation these years you are able to convert the most difficult and harmful people into Dharma and make them work for Dharma to become useful. You made non-virtuous people to become virtuous. You are so selfless. You are no difference from Avalokiteshvara.
Turkey Swamp is a place for you to reaffirm your original disposition of wisdom and compassion.
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you for your sharing. This is my maybe second time replying to your post. I am amazed by your memory of all your childhood. I can barely remember mine. I think this shows I was not really live my life with full awareness and concentration…..that’s why I have forgot so many things about my pass. I don’t like this and will do something to change this kind of attitude from now.
Best regards,
Maggie
細讀了这篇帖子，讓我想起當年初加入克切拉時，參與詹仁波切的自傳訪問小組。仁波切每每提到自己幼時的過去，總是感慨萬千。尤其是小時候，面對养父母親各種不合理的對待，總可以感受到仁波切那份在內心深處的難受。雖說仁波切出生于高僧的身份，但在年幼時所經歷過的一切，都是刻骨銘心的。
昨天，與一位友人有段挺長的對話，感觸良多，他說他接觸了佛法这些年，卻從來都不曾感受到佛法帶給他的益處。这点讓我很震惊也難受得無言。
讀著这篇文章，仁波切從小為了能夠習佛，须承受身心靈之苦，卻不曾言弃過，有些人卻因某些小執著卻輕言放弃。这是印記作崇抑或個人的習氣而造成？暫時沒有一個答案….
“佛法真正的目的，就是培养出一颗真正的慈悲心，全然不被情况的好坏所左右”，要实践起来没有想象中轻易。
环境好的时候——有钱有闲的时候布施、善良；要比在艰苦的时候，被激怒然后又在自己是“受害者”的时候继续不受外在环境左右而如实日常持着一颗悲心对待别人和自己，艰难太多了……要一直保持这样的觉知……
会继续努力，会一直铭记在心。谢谢仁波切。
Reading this post reminds me of the story in the Lamrim on how Atisha at 18 months old was already talking about refuge and the development of Boddhichitta.
Similarly, Rinpoche spontaneously did meditations and visualisations of Avalokiteshvara at only 11 years old! And at such a young age, Rinpoche could already see that his mother was suffering and developed compassion for his mother even while he was getting slapped. How many of us would think like this when we were 11:
“I read this book DOORWAY TO LIBERATION by Geshe Wangyal… he described the qualities of compassion of Avalokitesvara… when I read this I could not stop crying. I FELT AT THE MOMENT, the true purpose of dharma was to develop unaffected true compassion in the face of good and harm.”
Dear Rinpoche,
It is really great how you never gave up on your belief in dharma and Avalokiteshvara.
You sharing teaches that one should never give up and continue with the things that make you stronger. Because you grow up with a lot of difficulties you are a stronger person now. All of this made you strong and showed you how important a real friendship is. How much power and energy can arise from a friendship like you had with Marc. It is really great how he did support you, even that he couldn’t really understand what you are doing and called you “weird”. That is the way a real friendship is supposed to be.
Now you give back what this friendship had brought to you. Now you are the one who is supporting a lot people to find their way and to keep on to dharma, no matter how hard times can get.
Your example shows how important it is to continue things they are really important for us and to never give up, no matter how difficult outer circumstances might be. We will always find a way to follow our path!
Thank you for sharing such personal experience with all of us.
The sensation of beauty and peace overwhelmed me throughout Rinpoche’s sharing. This peace and beauty is not just from the ethereal description of Rinpoche’s visualization or the lush environment of Turkey Swamp. It is very much from Rinpoche’s pure love, dedication and commitment to the practice of Dharma.
Despite the tragic condition of Rinpoche where Rinpoche experienced deep contradiction of fear and love for Rinpoche’s mother, the story still ignites a strong sense of hope. Upon reflection, I learn that hope does not come from outside but from within. I understand that we are the master of our life but I always thought that hope is usually given by someone…even the hope bestowed by Dharma. However, here, I read how Rinpoche created the sense of hope from compassion, forgiveness and determination, which are all alit internally.
I also learn from Rinpoche’s example that consistent practice of Dharma helps stabilize our minds and gets our minds familiar with the Dharma habits. Thus, we must practice until when push comes to shove, we can still have Dharma in our action of body, speech and mind. This is the litmus test.
As always, thank you Rinpoche for your teaching. Thank you also for praying to live in and bearing everyday the harsh conditions of being amongst difficult people.
Dear Rinpoche,
the reference to a “strange kid” is in itself strange to me but so typical of your self-effacing modesty… When I read your blog, other words came to my mind: “amazing”, “spiritual”, “inspiring” and “humbling” were only some of the first.
I have snippets of memory from when I was 11 or 12 and they were certainly not about forgiveness or compassion. I think they circled around ping pong and basketball or something equally mundane… Harmless but not exactly earth-shattering activities.
I’ve had a peaceful childhood. My parents were sweet and supportive, just as they were kind to my siblings and me and my grandparents, as well as to everyone they come across. I’m blessed in that sense and I’m thankful to my parents for having given me a stable start in life. All the more, my heart goes out to you, Rinpoche, for having to go through and overcome such hard times as a child. Thank you for sharing these memories with us. I’ve been truly inspired ever since I was introduced to your teachings, your stories, your thoughts. While I believe my parents gave me a good foundation to be a good person, I’m now beginning to get a more focused guidance, to “make sense” of the “why and how” behind spirituality.
I’ve moved to Shanghai from Germany three weeks ago and have now joined the Shanghai group which meets regularly for Dharma class, led by Likheng and Christine. I know I have a lot of catching up to do as I keep mixing up the different prayers and names and stumbling over the Tibetan text but I’m learning. At least now I have the environment where I have the support of friends who share the same faith.
Rinpoche, may you stay in good health and live long so that we may learn more from you.
With respect,
Sean
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you for sharing your valuable experience to me and people in the world. This is the best story of compassion I have ever had!
Thanks Rinpoche for sharing this interesting article and bring the Turkey Swamp scene to KFR so that we may feel the same environment in beautiful Malaysia. In spite of that, Rinpoche had showed that how a enlighten pure mind at age 11 – 12 years old. It already prove that Dharma can bring forward from past life. So we are do in Dharma will not waisted…
i was thinking off what i’m doing at age 11, 12 ?? i don’t meet Dharma as family is praying for local deities, i’m only focus on how to get good result in my exam. It inspire me we cannot only looking on ourself, there is still more effort we can do.Tq
Reading about Rinpoche’s childhood and seeing what he was interested in and what he did is a sign of how much the dharma nature in him wanting to come out. While most of us indulged in one form of games or another or were spending time doing things that brought no benefit he was engaging in mantras and visualisation! Thank you for sharing this piece of your life with all of us.